The Buggy Physics of Superman (Part Four)

The most remembered and the most lampooned scene from the Superman movies is Superman attempt to turn back Time. A reoccurring problem for Superman is that Lois Lane keeps getting into danger. In this particular case, Superman was too late. Lois Lane is driving down a road when she is caught in a rockslide. The heavy rocks smash in her windshield and her car is flooded with dirt and rocks. She dies at the bottom of a ditch and Superman screams up to the sky in horror. He shoots up into the sky and whips around the Earth, flying faster and faster. He continues to build speed and he actually slows the Earth’s spin. He, then, manages to stop and reverse the Earth’s spin. Superman’s aim is to go back in time. What would obvious happen is the extinction of all life on Earth.

As stated above, an object is motion tends to stay in motion. Right now, as you read this paper, you are traveling at 1000mph. If Superman reversed the spin of the Earth, then everything not nailed down on that Earth would be flung off into space. I am not nailed down. Neither are you or anyone (hopefully) that you know. All of Earth’s oceans would come crashing onto land in Tsunamis more violent than the world has ever seen. The air, itself, would be affected. Biblical Hurricane would tear birds out of the sky, mashing them into nothing but broken bones, blood and feathers. Every building ever built would topple like a Jenga tower.

The Buggy Physics Of Superman (Part Three)

Imagine this: Lois Lane is dangling from the landing gear of an overturned helicopter. Down beneath her feet, there are more than thirty-stories of empty space. Her fingers peel away from the landing gear, one by one, and Lois falls through thin air at a rate of 9.81mph. Superman pulls open his dress shirt, revealing the red S on his chest. He shoots up and snatches her by she could hit the ground. “I’ve got you” Superman says to Lois. Lois looks down to the ground and all around and then asks “You got me. Who’s got you?”

The issue with this is that Lois appears to have hit Terminal Velocity. Terminal Velocity is the maximum speed an object can fall through a medium. Gravity is pulling at Lois at a rate of 9.81mph but the air is slowing her down. It can be assumed that Lois’s terminal velocity is approximately 120mph. For Superman to catch Lois in midair, he has to fly faster than the speed of her decent. Superman was also flying upward. Sir Isaac Newton introduced the First Law of Motion, which dictates that an object in motion will remain in motion until it is met by an equal or opposite force. This means that Superman is hitting Lois Lane at a speed faster than 120mph, but her internal organs and her skeletal structure are all moving at 120mph downward. Using real-world physics, Lois would die.

The Buggy Physics Of Superman (Part Two)

One of the most iconic scenes from the Superman films is that of Superman and Lois Lane flying over Metropolis. Superman floats down to Lois’s apartment windows and offers her his hand. She takes it and they go for a ride through the night air. At first, he carries her but, after no time at all, they are flying at arm’s length, wind combing through both of their hair. This scene, although lovely, ignores every law of Physics. Depending on how you read this scene, Lois Lane should either have been dangling from Superman’s outstretched arm or her arm should’ve been torn off. The speed of the scene suggests that the former should have happened. Lois appears, in the scene, to have achieved enough acceleration to have Lift. Lift is what allows planes to fly. To achieve flight, Lois’s lift had to be equal or greater than her weight and her Thrust Force, what is propelling her forward, must be greater than the Drag Force, wind-resistance, acting on her body. Lois’s body is completely horizontal, but both she and Superman are moving far too slow for that to be possible. It appears that her Thrust Force is too weak for flight. They’re moving like two kites on a strong breeze. I could be mistaken and both Superman and Lois could be flying fast enough to allow for Lois’s flight. I have to assume that Lois Lane weighs approximately 111lbs. Superman is reported to weigh 215lbs. That is a combined weight of 326lbs. Superman, Lois’s mode of acceleration, would need to provide -326lbs of Lift force. That, as I stated above, causes its own share of problems.

I had mentioned Tensile Strength earlier in this paper. Tensile Strength refers to the ability of an object to be stressed without breaking apart. The Tensile Strength of a human arm averages around 600lbs of force, applied. As I stated before, Superman has to provide 326lbs of Lift. The acceleration is acting on Lois’s very human body. This means, without factoring in the Thrust Force, Lois’s arm is more than halfway to the point of being torn from her body.

On average, a small Ultra-Light plane flies at 100mph at Take-Off. Lois Lane, most likely, weighs less than a piloted Ultra-Light plane. Lois, also, doesn’t have massive wings that would help her remain aloft. Because women tend not to fly, with or without Superman’s help, it is difficult to figure out what speed she would need to fly through the air. For the sake of argument, I will assume that Lois needs 100mph of Thrust Force. This means that she is experiencing -100mph of Drag Force. This all lends to the assumption that Lois Lane wouldn’t think much of Superman’s romantic gesture.