We're in 2012 and probably are all going to die! Yay! Oh,... you don't want to die?
Well, I guess I can give you a few tips for survuving the apocalypse.
1. Kill your Soul:
When the Mayan Death Bird comes spreading liquid death from above, it will be the strong and merciless that will survive. To work on this, kill someone and feel no remorse.
2. Hoard Everything
Fuck you, "Hoarders: Buried Alive". In the burning hellscape that will be the future, it will be the person with stuff that will proveil. Hoard everything and start stealing shit.
3. Guns, Guns, Guns
Shooting people in the face will be a way of life. Get a gun. You can't do that without a gun.
People in the future are normally pretty hot. You should be hot if you want to be in the future.
These 4 steps should keep you alive when everyone else is dead. Yay!
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