Spam Email Message

Hello,
I am Fred Noonan and I’m in need for your aid.

If you are student for the Histories, you will be aware that Amelia Earhart disappeared over the Atlantic Ocean over many ages ago. Her body was never discovered. I accompanied her on her flight and we two were, in truth, abducted by aliens. We were brought upon Class 5 alien Star Cruiser and were brought to planet in Andromeda galaxy. We were enslaved and experimented on. Amelia’s screams shall haunt my nightmares for ages. Amelia was transfigured into dog style monster with immense fanged mandibles and I can not ever die. My blood, green like lobster and my brain run on battery. It been long time, I never sleep. I, Amelia and other men made into creature slay all aliens in great conflict. Blood floods the streets like overflowing rivers and the alien councils surrendered to our might, but we are not merciful.
I come to you for opportunities for lifetime. Though we walk on four legged and others breaths on metal lungs, we do love and passion for Mother Earth Home and wish to return on her. Your American Government wishes no aliens to be earthbound. They refuse us access, believing us not fellow natives and we need emissary for aid. We wish this for you. The roll for you will be as financier for now, purchasing many expensive official petitions and documents to the American government. We have been away from lives for so many ages and we desire home, please be aiding us by replying soon. We grow impatient in our bubbling lust to our American home. We are great, merciless warrior, stained with much blood.

Thank you for bottom my cold, mechanical heart,
Fred Noonan, Loyal American.